Success is personal and everyone has their own definition of it. And that's cool. Some would define success as academic achievements, some as moving up the career ladder or promotion, some as being the best parent/child/spouse, some as been able to pray night pray every night and few pages of Qur'an every single day and some would define it as a combination of all. Again, that's cool, because each one of us is different and each one of us has different dreams and hopes and wishes to achieve. All successful people - in whatever they are successful in - have daily routines and habits that they have established. The western personal development gurus swear by them and are always teaching and drilling these routines and habits into their students. Obviously they got it from Islam! :D For instance we are taught by Rasool Allah that he would make the following dua; He said: "O Allah, bless my Ummah in its early hours." The early hours are the best. Praying night prayer in the last third of the night. Then praying Fajr and then reading some Qur'an. Its also one of the best times to read Qur'an as it's witnessed and recorded by the angels. And then follow this with quiet contemplation or in other words dhikr-Allah. Recite some tasbee, focus on the meaning. It will help quieten the mind of useless chatter and help us focus better. There's a reason why many meditate and do yoga in the early hours and that's one of the reasons they can have laser focus and achieve so much! So, we need to develop some positive habits and routines. If you haven't already then master the morning prayer routine and then add your mantras to it. What are these mantras? They are like statements - positive statements - repeated often which get us into a positive mindset and help us focus on the task at hand or our long term goals. What is YOUR mantra? Would you like to succeed and continuously have that energy switch which gets you into top form as and when you need it? Then it's time to create YOUR 'Unique Success Mantra' (if you haven't already). Read it, memorize it and switch into 'Excel-Mode' as and when you need. But before we begin - we need to clear the clutter and have a soulful therapy moment. We need to get rid of the trash from our soul and know that 'things will happen' - yes they will - that's the nature of our lives - even if you're the happiest care-free soul, it doesn't mean you won't be put into compromising situations - even if its not to do with you directly, then a loved one, friends, colleagues - and some being intimate and close relations - how do you deal with their issue(s) successfully, help them through it and then switch back into your own 'Excel Mode', back on track? Its about recognising and appreciating the importance of 'each' moment, which ties into the core of your existence - your life - which is limited and being time-bound, we have to get the best and enough done in the 'time' we have and so that means working on our 'focus'. We need to keep in mind the above and work on a step by step method on regaining our focus. Well, how do we do that? Here's how; a) Appreciating your life as 'Limited, Time-Bound and Precious' b) Your goals and ambitions are all time-bound - we have to achieve them in a specific time. c) What is precious is cared for and looked after (like a small child/animal). So what is precious to you? Is your life precious? d) Know that there is someone who you call on 24/7, 365 days without an appointment and without waiting in a queue and who will help you - who? Allah e) Supplicate (make dua) to Him and ask Him to help you f) Know that you're a means by which Allah wants goodness for your loved one - He put you there to help them - He gives you the strength to help them g) Know that you can only help those who want to be helped - in the end its between them and God h) Be polite, assertive, direct and confident when helping your loved ones - because you need to get back to your work/life/study - and there's only so much you can do for someone i) Always leave them in a happy, positive state - leave them with duas, ayahs and ahaadith - leave them hopeful - and insha'Allah they will soon see the light j) After you've helped them go back to your 'Success Mantra' (which we will create in a minute) and point #a above k) Eat healthy food, fruit, vegs, plenty of water, light exercise daily, walk daily, be in nature, parks, trees, flowers and listen to some Qur'an. Take a tech-break - no phones, tv, net, social media etc l) If the issues are seriously intense - then do the above point #k at least three times (different things from the list insha'Allah to add variety) and read your 'success' mantra again and point #a above again - and you'll soon be back on track and you'll have regained your focus insha'Allah! As I pointed out above we need to fix the issues of our soul first and you know things will creep up but you have to create awareness and be ready to deal with them. "Richness does not lie in the abundance of (worldly) goods but richness is the richness of the soul." Sahih Muslim Book 005: Hadith 2287 So now we have regained our focus - its time to create our success mantra insha'Allah. I'm going to share mine with you. Use it as a template or be inspired to jot your own down. In fact, mine is not even a one word statement or one line sentence. Its a whole paragraph and was inspired by a personal development book I read. Its pretty personal to me as I add the things that apply directly to me so you can add your own and personalise it insha'Allah. Its helped me to create laser focus and to get things done - alhamdulilah. And I read it daily! Bismillah ***From this moment on I will do what I need to do in order to excel in my deen, my ibaadah, my spirituality, my studies, my work, my businesses, my health, my wealth, my relationships and my life! I will operate in '150% EXCEL MODE turBo flow' from now on in every aspect of my life and be the best. I'm tired of being second best. I will Excel. I choose to be Extremely Successful insha'Allah, ameen!*** :) So, there you have it. My success mantra. By the way success is allowed in Islam - its how we deal with it and how we use it. Remember we have 'One Life and One Chance' to do all the good and right things and we should all have that 'One Vision' - Jannah al-Firdaus and to get there we have to pass the tests from this life. And Allah (swt) grants success to whom He wills - this world and the next! "Whoever works righteousness - whether male or female - while he (or she) is a true believer (of Islamic Monotheism) verily, to him We will give a good life (in this world with respect, contentment and lawful provision), and We shall pay them certainly a reward in proportion to the best of what they used to do (i.e. Paradise in the Hereafter)" [al-Nahl 16:97] Ready to write YOUR 'Success Mantra?' Just before you create yours and read it I want you to do a quick exercise. This involves you getting into a peak state. Think of a time when you were really happy with your achievement (whatever it is). I want you to feel that moment throughout your body. I want you to smell all the smells associated with it. What things were going through your mind at that time? What were you feeling? Feel it. Use all your five senses. Increase the feeling. Make it very bright and visual. Make it into 3D. And when you're at that peak state (or a halaal happy high) write your mantra and start repeating it. Say Bismillah and just go do it! Hope that helped y'all! :) Leave a comment below to inspire all our WBI'ers and email me if you need help with writing your success mantra or to go through those steps to trash that junk insha'Allah!
3 Comments
Today's post is a reflection post. I'm sure you'll be able to relate to it. It comes after, well, a lot of reflection... It doesn't matter who you are or where you're from, its like we all have to go through this in our life. Once, twice, thrice...until we get the message, learn the lesson and move on. Its like, you set out to do good and spread good, but there is always someone who will shake a pointy finger at you and say; 'Well, that's just not good enough!' Or; 'You're wrong!' You know, it could have even started very young. At school maybe? Your teacher didn't like your drawing when you were in reception class age 4/5. You thought you were Picasso creating a masterpiece with your house and four windows, a door in the middle, a pathway leading to the front gates, a tree and a cat - but she clearly thought otherwise! (And no, that didn't happen to me and yes I did draw that drawing and admit it, so did you!). It could have happened in later life. Your parents, siblings, friends pointing that pointy finger, rolling their eyes and choruses of; 'You just can't ever get it right can you?!' Ever had that happen to you? Like over and over and... *Ouch* Its like a punch in the face and instant knock out. You're trying to get up and recover and there goes the bell for round two! *Double ouch!* Why do we allow ourselves to get hurt this way? In fact, why do we do things to always please others or get approval? Why??? Its a proven psychological fact (you can google it) that humans have six basic needs. This theory was proposed by Maslow in 1943 in his paper; 'A Theory of Human Motivation'. In later years Tony Robbins (one of the Gurus of Personal Development and from whom yours truly is heavily inspired, motivated and influenced by) came up with his own six basic needs. Both Maslow and Robbins state that one of these needs is love/connection/belonging and another is significance (Robbins). We want to be and feel loved. We want to be and feel connected. We want to belong (either to immediate loved ones or in larger social groups - social acceptance). We want to be and feel significant. These are almost like our survival tools and to an extent a healthy dose of each is required for the healthy and holistic development of a human being. However, what can happen is that we get to a stage in life where we are always looking for approval and doing things to get attention so we feel significant - important - worthy. This may even lead us sometimes to do or act in unhealthy or immoral ways. Just so we get that approval. If you've ever been through any of that then know that its ok because what you were doing was being human (by the way I don't condone immorality). All humans do this! But the correct way would be if parents/teachers/guardians gave children the correct form of encouragement and support at an early age - even through our failures then we wouldn't be so messed up today. *Eureka Moment!* That's why I said at the beginning - we've ALL been through it. Because it started young and was embedded in us (usually around age 6) and we started to look for acceptance and feel low and sad if discouraged, it stayed with us. Its in our subconscious. It might even be eating you up right now! *Is it?* So even if your friends or family do this to you then realise that even they have been through it. Its like a sad, vicious, psychological cycle! *Yuk!* But it's time to break FREE - when? NOW! Allah (swt) has sent down a book of guidance. In it are treasures that even if Captain Hook knew about them then he would go out in search for them (and be one of the good guys)! This book - the Qur'an - is a guidance for mankind and therein lie all the answers. Do YOU want to stop this 'pleasing everyone' and looking for acceptance and feeling significant (beyond what is required as a basic need?) Then for YOU the Qur'an has a message... Ready? Bismillah... "Say: "Verily, my Salah (Prayer), my sacrifice, my living, and my dying are for Allah, the Lord of ALL that exists''. [Qur'an (6:162)] That's it! That's the one! Read it again, re-read it, re-read it again and now STOP - sit back, take 5 and reflect. I'll be right here when you come back - after 5 - we need to finish this post... Back? Cool! Ok, so yes, that's a verse which we need to memorise and truly reflect upon insha'Allah. What does it really mean? Simply this - that all that we do is for the sake of Allah - we live for Him and die for Him - only! And before you say; 'That's easy said than done!' - Well, yes, I know! This is life, it's not meant to be easy. That's not how lessons are learnt! If we give ourselves a chance and really apply this verse to our lives then almost all our worries will vanish. This is not to say that if you're at work you don't do what's in the job description or with a loved one you don't give them time etc - that's just silly. We have our worldly things to do and our worship to do. We have to balance it all. But if we understand this verse then the burden can be lifted and we can break free from these shackles. These shackles that weigh us down because we do stuff just to get approval and feel significant. And in the process are always unhappy, low, sad and have low self-esteem/confidence. Our purpose of creation is not to spend our days pleasing others or scheming of ways to gain approval. That's a waste of time and life and both are precious. Stop doing unnecessary things for approval! If they don't approve of you just the way you are then they never will! And if they laugh and hate then its on them - they have issues that they need fixing. The issue is not with you but them. And if you laugh or hate or treat others as though they always need your approval then stop and fix up as the issue is with you! If all of us could just take responsibility for our own actions and start fixing our broken hearts and healing our torn souls then we can start to be ok. We can't change anyone else's behaviour or actions but we can only change our reactions. Action Point & Tips: 1. What positive changes can you start making in your own lives? 2. How will you help younger souls (children/siblings/nieces/nephews) on this path to pleasing Allah alone (using the verse as an example)? 3. How will you react if you feel the need to please someone or seek their approval for your existence. Don't just read this post and be inspired by it only but get motivated to take action insha'Allah. Want to see change? Then be the change! Today! "Say: "Verily, my Salah (Prayer), my sacrifice, my living, and my dying are for Allah, the Lord of ALL that exists''. [Qur'an (6:162)] We live in a society and culture where we want to work hard only so we accumulate all the goods of this world. We want, want and want! Its ok to have goods of this world - if done in moderation. We need a roof on top our heads and clothes on our body. We need that. So we work for it and its ok. I don't judge as that's not my purpose in life. I believe if God has blessed us with wealth then we can buy what we want so long as we give plenty in charity and help our loved ones. That's my personal belief and I stick by it. But there is a difference in being rich and blessed by God and just wasting that money on things we don't need at all. Western personal and spiritual development Guru's live by the daily mantra of; 'Give and You shall Receive'. Its from the Bible. But what's amazing is that our deen - Islam - also teaches us to give. It teaches us this principle in depth - subhan'Allah! Giving in charity is fundamental in Islam and there are two types - obligatory and voluntary. We know that Zakah is one of the Pillars of Islam - to give 2.5% of our wealth to the needy (in the Qur'an there are 8 categories of people who are eligible for Zakah). This is a form of obligatory charity. Sadaqa is voluntary charity and something we should do on a daily. It is a form of ibaadah - worship. It is sadaqa to smile at another. Each new day our limbs perform sadaqa (ie prayer, giving etc). Allah (swt) says; "You cannot attain to righteousness unless you spend (in charity) out of what you love." (3:92) And; Abu Huraira (may Allah be pleased with him) related that Allah's messenger (PBUH) said: "No money ever decreases because of charity; when a servant of Allah forgives, Allah increases him in dignity; and whenever a person humbles himself to Allah, Allah will elevate his status." Bukhari & Muslim. So why are we so stingy? Why can we not give? It almost seems as though we will become poor by giving! However that is not the case. Look at the beautiful teachings of our deen yet we are so miserly and stingy - traits and characteristics which have openly been condemned and prohibited by our beloved Prophet (pbuh). The western gurus give, give and give and yes they receive, receive and receive. God does not withhold from His creation. He is the One to give. We are not looking at aqeedah or different belief systems (of different religions) but we are looking at the mindset - the positive mindset and belief system about giving in charity. And most of them make a 6 figure income (how do I know? I study them!). Do you then stop to wonder why the Ummah is in such turmoil and pain? I'm asking you to for just a moment put aside the 'signs of the hour' (which, yes they are coming true one by one) and look at it from a different perspective. On the one hand we have oil rich billionaires building tall buildings almost out of space and then we have those who don't even know where the next meal will come from. Why? Why has the Ummah fallen so deep? Please don't cry for another great pious leader to appear to take us to victory because they were human beings! They trusted in Allah, believed in Him and did the right thing. We don't worship the creation but the Creator! You and I - my dear friends - have the capability of being great and leading the Ummah to victory! YES WE CAN! Its all about the mindset and its all about giving. And its all about believing and trusting Allah. Have we lost faith and trust? Naud'billah! Subhan'Allah! We are that busy that we can't even stop to help our own immediate family and we want to help the Ummah? Yes, dua is the weapon of a believer - but dua is a pre and post requisite to action. Action doesn't happen by itself as we know Allah said in the Qur'an that He will change our condition only when we first change it ourselves - when we take the first step to positive change. So why are we so afraid to lose our wealth? Why have we become so greedy? The wealth we have is not even ours! Its Allah's amanah - trust - given to us so we can spend on ourselves, our families and all of creation - spend in His way on His creation. Give and you shall receive! And if you don't have a lot of wealth to help others then give a smile at least. Give a helping hand. Give a kind word. Each of us can give if we become a little selfless. Ask Allah (swt) and He shall give - give thanks and He shall give more - life is a test and preparing for our eternal bliss - supplicate to Him - see things for what they are and don't make them bigger (don't make a mountain out of a mole hill) watch your thoughts, words, feelings and actions. Its all a cycle - don't fall into the negative trap that you can't do or give because you are fooling no one except yourself. Instead create a positive cycle. Just the way a smile is contagious so is this positive cycle. Each of us right NOW has the ability to 'Give' and then to 'Receive'. We have all the resources we need to begin right now insha'Allah. Giving is so good for the soul that you can instantly feel the peace within and without. And (remember) when your Lord proclaimed: "If you give thanks, I will give you more (of My Blessings) {14:7} Let's become true and worthy servants of Allah who give in His way and when we receive we give thanks. Tips and Action Points: 1. Scan your life - what can you do without? What is useless? Get rid of completely (if it is completely useless) or give in charity (if usable). 2. Give £1 or $1 or €1 or whatever your currency in your country to charity once every month (that's the least we can do, co'mon!) 3. Get together with friends and family and think of creative ways to help the Ummah and humanity and animals. 4. Don't remember or note down what you gave but always remember what you receive and then give thanks for it! 5. Share this message with your loved ones and make today's mantra; 'Give and You shall Receive!' Insha'Allah! :) |
AuthorNadia Leona Yunis Archive
|